DESERT STORM VII
Avid readers of my blog already know that for some odd reason I'm fascinated by "streaks." My unhealthy interest in the concept of steaks was well documented in Prattle #10. For anyone who is just arriving at Palmer's Playground I would highly recommend reading this previous prattle before you read my account of Desert Storm VII (oh my, I'm now requiring prerequisites).
An annual outing that I recently attended in Scottsdale, AZ is now being officially tracked on my "streak radar screen." I have attended this outing for 7 consecutive years which means it's only 3 years shy of reaching official streak status (I make up the rules by the way).
The report I'm filing on this weekend outing will of course be done in my typical rambling style. Rest assured that my rules of the 4 Rs will be adhered to....Recap..Rehash....Retell....Repeat (see Prattle #18 if confused...this prerequisite thing is getting out of hand....starting to sound like a college course).
In order to understand and appreciate this annual event I highly recommend that you enroll in the history class that I have provided as the foreword to my report.
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HISTORY CLASS
Course Name: Scottsdale Outing 101
This class will use the Joe Friday approach ..."Just the facts ma'am" (that's for you Dragnet fans)
Event Name: Desert Storm (for those of you who flunked Geography class, Arizona is located in the desert......and my group of friends "storm" into Scottsdale every October).
- Location: Scottsdale, AZ
- Dates: 3 day weekend in late October
- Host: Mike Ripley
-Year 1 attendees: Mike Ripley, Scott Ripley, Jeff Ripley, Jim Whiteside, Craig Whitehead, Paul Bucher, Steve Hinrichs, Paul Peterson
-Attendees added in Years 2-6 : Bruce Schliep, Pete Schliep, Jon Gallo
-Event Activities: Golf, Arizona State football games, Phoenix Suns NBA basketball games, Phoenix Coyotes NHL hockey games, Arizona State Fair, Disk (don't call it a Frisbee) golf, Night Golf (glowing balls in the dark). dining at nice restaurants, hanging out at sports bars...fellowship....renewing friendships...and mindless banter....
Player Introductions:
-Mike Ripley - (a.k.a Rip) life long friend from my home town of Zumbrota (currently lives in Chicago)
-Scott Ripley - Mike's son
-Jeff Ripley - Mike's brother and a life long friend from Zumbrota
-Paul Bucher, Steve Hinrichs, Bruce Schliep - live long friends from Zumbrota
-Pete Schliep - Bruce's son
-Craig Whitehead, Jim Whiteside - Rip's friends from Chicago
-Jon Gallo - Rip's son-in-law from Chicago
In the beginning.....
-This event can all be traced back to Mike Ripley's (Rip's) son, Scott Ripley, who after graduating from a suburban high school in Chicago decided to cast his lot at Arizona State University in Tempe, AZ.
-During Rip's visits to see Scott at ASU, Rip developed an affection for the Tempe / Scottsdale area of Arizona ..... it wasn't long before Rip purchased a nice little town house of his very own in Scottsdale.
-Rip now had a place to stay while visiting Scott at ASU and a place where he could go to escape from Chicago's winter weather.
-During one of Rip's early visits to Tempe he played in golf tournament (4 person scramble) hosted by the ALPHA KAPPA PSI fraternity that Scott belonged to at ASU.
-This was not an Animal House type fraternity, it was a co-ed professional business fraternity that promotes professional development in all areas of study. Many of the top students at ASU belonged to this fraternity and this golf tournament was a fund raiser for scholarships at ASU.
-The following year Rip's brother Jeff joined in on the fun and played in the golf tournament....the weekend in Arizona had now grown into nice family outing for the Ripley family.
Desert Storm is born.....
-In 2004 Rip decided he wanted to invite some of his friends to come and join the Ripley clan at the ASU golf tournament. (see player introduction section for attendees in Year #1 )
-The golf tournament is played on the Karsten course that is located in the shadows of ASU's Sun Devil Stadium (football)...this is also the golf course where Phil Mickelson honed his game when he was a student at ASU.
-Rip's weekend travel package also included two additional rounds of golf and tickets to the ASU homecoming football that was played on Saturday afternoon.
-After reviewing Rip's offer I of course signed up immediately......surprise...surprise....others were quick to follow....
-This package deal had all the ingredients that a yearly tradition requires.......a vision of a new "streak" was already dancing in my head.
Desert Storm continues to grow...
-This event was soon written down on every one's yearly calendar....in magic marker.....am I dating myself?...does anyone actually track their schedules on a paper calendar anymore?.....of course I do....and I sell technology for a living....
-As I predicted this outing did evolve into a yearly "tradition" ....the number of attendees varied each year but we always had a very good showing.....and we always had lots of fun....
-As noted in the player introduction section a few new people were added along the way so we always had a good pool of people to draw from each year....
-Of course the only person who has attended every year is ME.....I know, shocking news....
-As they do with all of the Super Bowls I have assigned an ascending roman numeral number to each Desert Storm event....this year's outing will be Desert Storm VII....
Trouble in the Desert......
-As the plans were being made for this year's (2010) trip to Scottsdale my biggest fear came to fruition......none of the guys could attend this year..OH NO!!. SAY IT AIN"T SO....NOW WHAT?....
-Are people really that busy?....even Rip's son, Scott, had left Scottsdale and was attending grad school....in Hong Kong of all places.....obviously he wasn't going to be hopping on the next flight out...my world was definitely falling apart.
-A statement I coined several years ago certainly applied again...IT'S HARD TO HAVE FUN!!....(as in people are just too busy to have fun anymore)
-Of course in my whacked out world I'm never too busy to have fun, hence my frustration.
-I'm like the little kid who knocks on every door in the neighborhood and always gets the same answer....."no he can't come out and play today." (I know, I know that's my problem....refer to my resume)..
-Right when it appeared that all was lost Rip saved the day.......he still wanted to go....did I want to join him?.....it would just be the two us.....play some golf.....skip the tournament...see some games..........a much more lower key weekend...(art fairs, museums and shopping malls were off limits)....
-It took me about 2 seconds to accept the invitation.....I know that Rip always provides a great weekend of fun so the giddiness immediately started to build...
-Whew!....a major catastrophe in my life had been averted .....Desert Storm VII would go on as scheduled....
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DESERT STORM VII .....RECAP and REHASH
Captains Log...Star Date 28 October 2010 (that's Star Trek talk to you non-Trekkie's)
-Arrive in Phoenix on Thursday night at 10:45 pm...on time....giddiness has set in...
-Rip provides the limo service back to his "crib" in Scottsdale...
-We need to sleep fast because we have an early tee time on Friday morning...
-It's like Christmas Eve to me....a big bag stuffed full of fun will be under my golf bag tomorrow...
-Visions of pars and birdies are dancing in my head.....
-The golf gods are busy making plans on how they will treat us this weekend....
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Captains Log...Star Date 29 October 2010
-The wake call comes early...5:30 am....gorgeous morning with an even better forecast...80 degrees and sunny all weekend....my giddiness meter is being tested......
-Head north to Prescott, AZ for today's round of golf....a very scenic hour and a half drive through the mountains and the desert....
- Stoneridge Golf Club is on the docket for today...located just outside of Prescott, AZ.....
-Official description from Stoneridge's brochure - "This golf course is a desert/mountain course hybrid with picturesque desert views and dramatic elevation change".....
-Interpretation - "Bring a lot of eggs (balls)"
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| "Rip, I don't belong on a course this nice" |
-Surprised to hear that no one will be playing with us....course is not busy at all...open tee times....golf play appears to be down all over...too expensive?.....takes too much time?.....no good at it?....oh yeah, have you heard about this recession thing?....
-Without playing partners I have no chance of getting another Dean and Shelia type story today (see Prattle # 11....greatest golf story ever.....and it's true....and I was an eye witness....a must read).
-Meet a young woman who is helping golfers with their bags....her name is Summer...she actually grew up in Prescott and still lives there....didn't know that anyone was actually "from" Arizona.....what a great name for someone who lives in the desert.
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| "Oh come on Summer, be my caddy" |
-No weather today...don't feel hot.... don't feel cold......if you don't feel anything how can you say there is any weather at all?....it was simply perfect.
-This course is built in the foothills of the mountains....incredible scenery.....big fancy houses tucked away in the mountains....designed for mountain goats....you could never walk it.
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| "Rip, your swing is as smooth as butter" |
Driving the golf cart is challenging....steep inclines and descents.....twisting turning cart paths.....roller coaster like......more speed bumps than a shopping mall parking lot.
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| "Whoa Nellie" |
-Rip was the cart driver and he did an excellent job behind the wheel...on one steep path I was caught day dreaming and I almost fell off the cart.....if I wouldn't have caught myself.a search party would still be looking for me down at the bottom of a deep ravine....all I could see down there was body bags.....
-The golf gods smiled on us today......gave us both several good shots.....they owed us...for the most part they were good to us all weekend....I still managed lose my share of eggs.
-Nice drive home.....lively discussion......had my 3 x 5 note cards ready....they list all the topics I want to cover during the weekend.....being properly prepared for a meeting is beat into me on daily basis in my world .....preparation...preparation....preparation....
-Back at the Ripley Ranch I needed to extend my exercise streak...(yes, I know I need help and my therapist is doing her best)........
-Evening plans?....many choices but we decide to attend the Phoenix Suns - LA Lakers NBA basketball game.....got lucky and found some pretty good seats for close to face value....center court....26th row...not bad....
-This game had everything for me.....
-Steve Nash.......my favorite player in the whole league
-Phoenix Suns....my favorite team to watch
-The Lakers.......the team I love to see lose
-Kobe Bryant....the player I love to strongly dislike
-Phil Jackson...,,the coach I love to strongly dislike
(hate is too strong)
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| Love......Strongly Dislike |
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| "Trust me, that is Kobe shooting a lay up" |
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| Strongly Dislike x 2 |
-The Lakers of course win....they usually do.... a very entertaining game.....fast pace....close game....packed house....loud....great atmosphere.....got our money's worth...
-A quick night cap at a local sports bar and we called it day....note card time again....like a boy scout....always prepared...crossed off several more items on my list of topics to discuss....
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Captains Log...Star Date 30 October 2010
-Another early wake up call...6:00 am....off to Longbow Golf Club in Mesa....another perfect day was waiting for us....sunny and 85 degrees....
-Reduced green fees had caught Rip's attention..... appeared to be a great deal for us.....high end course at an affordable rate....
-Longbow's credentials according to their brochure - one of the top 25 Courses in Arizona...2010 Golf Magazine, Best Courses Near You....2010 Golfweek’s Best Courses You Can Play.... Top 10 Public Golf Courses in Arizona...
-Interpretation: "Hackers like you shouldn't be playing this course."
-Perfect day.....you don't even need a weatherman down here....
-We will have playing partners today....great.....hope they are a couple of characters that will give me a good story.
-Two Mexican playing partners...Jami (pronounced "Ime") and Chuy (pronounced Chewy).....very nice guys ....pretty good golfers..... gave me absolutely nothing to write about...very disappointed.....look up the word "bland" in the dictionary and there will be pictures of these two guys.
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| "Will you write a story about us?" |
-Quickly discovered why the green fees were discounted when we reached the first green.....over seeded greens hadn't been mowed yet....needless to say the greens were not good.....long grass and very fuzzy..
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| "I can't even watch.....I'll never find it....toss me another ball" |
-The guy in the pro shop withheld the truth....told us about the greens being over seeded.... failed to mention that the greens had not been mowed yet....never have seen greens with grass this long....
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| "OH MY!.....that went a long way" |
-Beautiful course.....horrible greens...fortunately I'm a terrible putter so it had no effect on me........Rip did mange to hammer home a long birdie putt at one point.....
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| "Good thing we are done Rip, I'm out of balls" |
-Back to Rip's ranch......needed to take care of my exercise streak again...there is time to fit in a quick run before our next scheduled event.
-During my run I did my first good deed of the weekend....found a cash card on the running path.....picked it up.... Rip called the bank....card was cancelled.....we destroyed the card...the bank gave the card owner the good news.....woman at the bank said "I made his day".(remember that quote for later)
-Off to the Arizona State football game... homecoming game against a hapless team from Washington State University.
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| "I love the pomp and the pageantry of college football" |
-Rip had secured some great seats on the 40 yard line...10 rows up....not a hot ticket however.... 75,000 seat stadium is about half full....reminded me of a Gopher football crowd....
-ASU destroys Washington State by a score of 42-0....can my Gophers play this Washington State team? ....Gophers might actually win.....on second thought maybe not....how can I forget that loss to lowly South Dakota?
-Mandatory stop at a bar called the "Drift Lounge".....the official headquarters for our Desert Storm weekends.....this place is geared for the younger set but we go there anyway...nice little patio for us outside...
-Beautiful warm evening.....the people watching was at its peak.....there's a Halloween block party just down the the street....costumes everywhere....my head was on a swivel...wow!!!.....this was not like any Halloween party I had ever attended.....no jack-o-lanterns in site....this was not some little kid party...this was the big leagues....
-Our hunger finally trumped our people watching...walked over to Don and Charlie's restaurant..... another popular destination for the Desert Storm gang.....this steak house is probably geared more for the old retired set....but again we go there anyway....food is very good...
This restaurant could also be called a sports memorabilia museum.....autographed pictures, balls, bats, jerseys, etc from every big name sports figure you can name from the last 60 years....you could spend several hours in there and you still could not see it all...it's amazing.......
-The big question of the night.......do a couple guys "of a certain age" who have no costumes to wear dare go down to the block party?.... we hesitated for only about 30 seconds.....couldn't pass up this opportunity.......we had stumbled onto the mother load of people watching ......never have seen anything quite like this.....
-Hundreds upon hundreds of people were descending upon this area around the block party......a continuous string of cabs, limos and vans were dropping off people who were all in full costume.....to say the atmosphere was festive would be a massive understatement.
-I quickly learned that Halloween costumes have drastically changed since my day......it now appeared that Halloween was a time for young women to wear the skimpiest and tightest outfits they could find.....not that I'm necessarily complaining....but these really weren't Halloween costumes in my book.....of course that didn't keep me from looking at them....
-What happened to the your traditional costumes?... witches, ghosts, goblins, monsters, famous people, objects, professions...where's the creativity?.....have I been away too long?....or is this how they celebrate Halloween in the warm weather climate?
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| "No Wicked Witches?" |
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| "No Herman Munsters?" |
I will give the guys some credit because many of them did actually have some good costumes....one of my favorites was a John Lennon and Yoko Ono couple.....and of course there was the mandatory Elvis sighting....
I didn't dare take any pictures....an old guy with no costume taking pictures of all these party goers?...not a good idea.....afraid I would be cuffed and taken downtown by the cops.....or punched in the mouth.... .
-We should have at least had some masks on to cover up our old age.......maybe next year....
-Celebrating Halloween has never been a big deal to me anyway because every day is Halloween in my world....put on my costume every day.... a suit, a tie and my salesman face......then forced to give a command performance on a daily basis .....still managed to fool them for over 25 years.....where's my Oscar?
-Decided to leave before someone asked us to leave.......it was only 10:30 pm and this party was just getting starting....if we only had some masks to wear.....
-It became apparent that Rip and I are in "no-man's land"...too old to be young and too young to be old.....oh well, we will soon be old enough to be old....and if we don't realize it, someone will surely tell us.
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Captains Log...Star Date 31 October 2010
-Very early wake up call today....up at 5:15 am (at least I thought it was 5:15 - more later).....need to get my run in before we leave for golf...the sickness continues....(as least I know I'm sick...that's the first step to recovery).
-Beautiful morning for a run...sunny and warm..... day # 650 in now officially in the books....but then who's counting?......other than me that is......mental discipline or mental illness?....you be the judge.
-Bedroom clock snafu causes a minor problem...for you Seinfeld fans....it's the New York City marathon episode....late for our tee time....fortunately there were plenty of tee times available....gottta love that recession....
-Tish of sadness today.....my flight leaves at 3:20 pm.....it seems like I just got here...my fun bag still has some fun left in it so today will still be a good day.
-SunRidge Canyon Golf Club in Fountain Hills is the course today......
-Course description - your golf adventure begins at the upper mouth of the canyon and descends switch-back style to the canyon floor. Along the way, the golf course follows the rugged natural terrain of stony ridges, rock outcroppings and secluded hollows. Don't let this tranquil desert setting fool you. This course's rare beauty tests every aspect of your game....
-Translation - Don't be an idiot, play from the white tees, PLEASE!
-Testosterone levels takes over.....no white tees for us..... foolish decision.....definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.....in this case we are insane.
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| "Palmer, not sure what you're doing but the hole is over here" |
No partners again....no stories to write.....a tad disappointing.....hardly anyone was playing today....what has happened to the golf industry?
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| "Hey Rip, I found your ball, it's in the hole" |
-On the 7th hole it was time for Good Deed #2 of the weekend ....found a glass case laying just off the fairway...an expensive designer pair of prescription glasses were in the case....put the case in our cart and planned to turn them at the clubhouse....(more on this later)
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| "I find that my swing is so much better when a ball doesn't get in the way" |
-Hole #17 is the signature hole ....course brochure describes it this way...the 17th Hole is truly one of a kind. Only here can a golfer play a 209-yard par three over a boxed canyon one day, then play a 152-yard par three off an elevated tee the next day.
-Guess which tees we played from?......reference testosterone levels and insanity....
-We didn't hit the greatest shots off this tee box....it was long carry over a big ravine.
-A golf course employee was down by the green out of our view and saw our tee shots....he drives up to us and says the exact thing we didn't want to hear......"Hey guys, you don't have to hit from this tee box, there are other tee boxes down at the bottom of the hill".....OUCH!!......but he was right.....the sad part is that we would do the same thing all over again if we had the chance....
-Playing golf in the desert is much different than playing in Minnesota....
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| 'I got him....that rattler never knew what hit him" |
On the 18th fairway a guy comes driving up on his cart and yells at us in the fairway..."hey did you guys happen to find a pair of glasses?".....of course the answer was yes...... he then had the classic reaction when you find something you thought you lost....a huge body type sigh as in "thank goodness I found them"....
As the guy grabbed his glasses he says....."You made my day!" (reference earlier bank card story)......Wow, that makes me 2 for 2 on the weekend....not exactly saving the world but I did manage to help out two complete strangers and "make their day".....what's better than that??.....
-Round # 3 is in the books and I still have some balls left....amazing.......don't be sad that it's over...be happy that it ever happened....
-The annual awards banquet was held on the veranda overlooking the golf course.....excellent Sunday brunch was served....pictures are taken....speeches are given....awards handed out....
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| "We look so much better when you can't see our faces" |
-Rip presents me a special award in recognition of my perfect attendance at this annual event...
-My fun bag is empty and my giddiness meter is broken....again....both are signs of another successful Desert Storm weekend.
-Rip and I surprised ourselves and actually played much better golf than we normally do....a very nice bonus to the weekend...
-Rip is the best host in the business and he lived up to his reputation again this weekend.
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| Desert Storm flame is extinguished for another year |
-The Desert Storm clock has already started the count down to next year's event....see you next year!!
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| "Tick...Tick....Tick" |
