Palmer's Playground: 37. Siesta Key Memories

Is it time to go again already?

After a brief rest back in Minnesota, it was time for Freddy the Freeloader to hit the road again and head to Stop #2 on my Retirement Tour. This stop was going to again take me to the beautiful state of Florida. However, this trip would not require me to leave the planet earth as I had done when I visited 'The Villages" in February- see prattle #36. This outing was going to take me to one of my favorite vacation spots in the United States, Siesta Key in Sarasota, FL.

I'm here!!!...come and pick me up.

Siesta Key was a place I had visited with some buddies of mine every year for a stretch of 20 years (1985 - 2005). These trips were built around playing golf in the morning. sitting on the beach in the afternoon, and going on out on the town in the evening. We always had a great time on these yearly trips that we took in March. This trip was always the highlight of my year.

Rated as the #1 beach in the world...per the chamber of commerce that is

As luck would have it some good friends of mine who had also retired were renting places in Sarasota for the months of January to March. So guess what?...they invited me to come and visit them this year....and how could I possibly so no?.....I hadn't been to Siesta Key for several years so I jumped at the chance to go back to one of my favorite places for another visit...especially when the place I would be staying was one block from the beach and one block from the entertainment district called "Siesta Village."

The place to be after dark....festive atmosphere every night

Shop during the day.....party at night

So let's meet my two friends who were staying in Sarasota....

Tom Christenson
-Retired teacher and coach - Osseo High School
-Play basketball with him - Every Sunday night
-Attends Gopher BB and FB games with me
-Tom and his wife, Sandy, were my hosts

Hey Palmer....get your butt down here!

Bill Auten
-Retired sales person - Tires
-Grew up in Moorhead with Tom
-Attends Gopher BB and FB games with Tom and me
-Bill and his wife, Lynn, were also my hosts

I can still get you a good deal on a set of tires

Another retired friend and his wife were also going to be in Sarasota while I was there so my visit turned into a week long party.

Larry Anderson
-Retired teacher and coach - Eden Prairie HS
-Grew up in Moorhead with Tom and Bill
-Attends Gopher BB games with me
-Larry and his wife, Kathy, will be guests like me

Do you know someone who will give me a deal on a beachfront condo?

Here are my people......(Sandy is missing)

Larry...Bill...Kathy...Lynn....Tom

In order to properly tell the story of my trip, I have divided my prattle into the folllowing 4 sections....

SECTIONS

1. Spring Training Baseball Games
2. Siesta Key Beach
3. Boat Trip
4. Life in "Siesta Village" (name of the entertainment area on Siesta Key....not to be confused with "The Villages" which was the name of the place I visited on my Retirement Tour Stop #1)

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1. SPRING TRAINING BASEBALL GAMES

On Sunday or Day #2 of my visit the boys attennded the Twins - Rays game in.......The gates to the stadium did not open on time because their was a racoon roaming the grounds...believed to be rabid. After a wild chase by law enforcement officiers the critter was brought out on a stick and the impatient crowd voiced their approval.

We got 'em

Upon entering the ballpark, Larry and I sprinted to the center field seating area in hot pursuit of a prime table which was on the rail above the homerun fence. It was quite a scence....Larry and I trying to out run people half our age. I didn't see anyone in our age group running.....oh well, we got the table we wanted!

I think I only ran over one woman and two kids to get the table located here

We don't have to worry about any more rabid racoons do we?

Where's Palmer?....he better show up with beers for both of us

I didn't have the beers....I was roaming around...still a little kid at heart

Larry shamelessly begged a Twins minor leaguer to throw him a baseball....he used the old line "it's for my grandson"....it worked, he got his ball.....now the question is....will his grandson ever see the ball?.

Remember the 10th commandment....you shall not covet your neighbors table

Twins win..... Twins win......Twins win!!!!!

On Wednesday we attended the Twins - Orioles game in Sarasota. Lynn and Kathy joined the boys at this game. We again had some good bar rail seats in left field right behind the Twins bullpen. Fortunately we didn't have to deal with any rabid animals in this ballpark.

I've already forgotten what it's like to have a full time job

Why do they call this a bullpen?....what do bulls have to do with baseball?

Now I get it....Carl Pavano is as big as a bull

Sneaking into good seats is all part of attending a baseball game

I know I used to be a sales rep...but what did I sell again?

Twins lose.....Twins lose.....Twins lose....

After the game we stopped at a bar near the ballpark to collect the free beer that our game ticket provided for us. At this bar we met an older guy who was by himself and was in desparate need to talk with someone...anyone. Unfortunately he started talking to our group and we soon found out this guy had no one to talk to....he was flat out boring and he never stopped talking....he wouldn't leave us alone.

Maybe if we ignore him he will go away

This guy was an Oriole fan who made the trip to spring training every year. Unfortunately the more he talked the more I realized that this somewhat obnoxiou guy was way too much like me....single....no kids....big baseball fan....sports junkie...talks to strangers in bar....oh my this was not good. He proceeded to tell us that Sarasota is a dull and boring city....no women....no night life.....no action. He talked as if he was some kind mover and shaker...a real ladies man....the guy was delusional.....could I become this guy?....please tell me no.

OH MY!.....was I looking in the mirror here?.....AHHHHH!

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2. SIESTA KEY BEACH

I'm baacck...returning to the scene of 20 years of serious fun....I love the beach!!

Memory Lane is my permanent address....this where my buddies and I used to sit..

The first order of business is to set up camp....then let the women come to me

Hey everybody.....Palmer has arrived....let's get this party started

I soon found out that women on the beach had no interest in talking to me or posing in a picture with me.Oh how times have changed. It must be that these young women are afraid that their picture might show up somewhere on the internet. On the other hand it could be that they are just flat out afraid of a 57 year old man who tries to talk to them.....hmmmm... it's got to be the fear of having their picture show up on the internet...right?...come on man, you have to work with me here.....tell me I'm right.

This is cheating....posing with Tom's daughter Kathy....oh well, whatever it takes

I did finally meet a nice woman on the beach who did talk to me and also agreed to pose in picture with me. This divorced woman was named Carol and she told me that she traveled to Minneapoils quite often on business. I gave her my card and I told her that she should call me when she came to town and maybe we could meet for a drink. During our conversation she did lead me to believe that she would call when she came to Minneapolis.

Still waiting for that call....how many weeks has it been now?

As I was walking on the beach one day I couldn't believe who I saw coming towards me.....it was none other than Baltimore Orioles guy and he was talking to himself as he was looking at the Orioles media guide...was I looking at the future here?......is this how I will end up some day?

If I ever become this guy please shoot me...no jury will ever convict you

I became so desparate that I resorted to posing with naked statues

A full week on the beach and I didn't come close to Christmas card photo

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3. BOAT TRIP

We rented a boat so we could take a lesuirely cruise up the intracoastal waterway on a 3 hour tour....a 3 hour tour.

Skipper Tom took us on a 3 hour tour....the weather never did start getting rough

I'm Norwegian.....this is too good....something bad must be going to happen

Don't worry Skipper....Gilligan can take it from here

Wow!.....they are raising the bridge for us?....I love being important!

I don't even know what day it is anymore....all I know is every day is a "Funday"

Throw me a life jacket....I can't swin a lick

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4. LIFE IN "SIESTA VILLAGE"

Siesta Village is the area on Siesta Key where all the shops, restaurants and bars are located. My quarters on Siesta Key were located only one block from Siesta Village so therefore I logged a lot of time there during my week's stay.

I started every day with breakfast at a restaurant called the Broken Egg. Dick Vitale, the famous basketball analyst from ESPN, often came to the Broken Egg to greet people and of course sell this wares (books, t-shirts, etc). One morning as walked down the street I could hear Dickie V's voice in the distance....yes, he was live and in person at the Broken Egg that day.

Better get a TO baby....My guy Palmer is truly a PTPer

Vitale Lingo
*Time Out
**Prime Time Player

Before I headed out on the town for the evening festivities I needed to first get in a good old game of shuffle board. Unfortunately Tom and I got schooled by Larry and Bill in our game. I think I'm still too young to be any good at this game....wait until I'm 75, I will dominate this game!

My team may have lost but check out my form....style points should count

My goal at the beginning of my week's stay was to get on a first name basis with all of the bartenders and servers in Siesta Village. I wanted to be able to walk in any place in the Village and have everybody know my name....you know like the old TV show Cheers....I wanted "Norm Status". I'm not sure I achived all my goals but I was able to make my mark at several of the local watering holes.

Ashley and Amanada were bartenders who did give me "Norm Status"

My other goal for the week was to meet and talk to as many new people as possible. I found this task to be much more difficult than I had anticipated. In this day and age people seem to be much more wary of strangers who wants talk to them. Of course it could just be that no one is really that interested in talking to 57 year old guy who is sitting at the bar.(that's probably the real reason but I'm not ready to admit that yet).

What's wrong with me?....why the cold shoulder?

After being shut down by numerous young women, I decided I would try one more time and if I struck out again I was officially done with it. There were two atttractive young women sitting next to me at the bar one evening and I decided to use my #1 "line"..."Do you mind if we change the TV channel" (maybe this explains why I'm still single at age 57). Finally I caught a break and my line worked becasue these two women actually appeared interested in talking to me. Their names were Paige and Amy and they were staying on Siesta Key visiting their mother.

They like me....they really like me! (Paige, Palmer, Amy)

As it turned out the key to our "connection" was the fact that Paige and Amy were both huge sports fans. Talking sports of course landed right in my "sweet spot." (I'm a sports junkie you know). Paige and Amy were also avid fans of the Big 10 conference because they both had attended Big 10 schools and their Dad played football at Ohio State for Woody Hayes in the early 1960's. I had a great time talking sports with these two very nice and fun loving women.....this encounter gave me new hope....maybe I can still play the game...in any event I plan to continue to keep dropping my "killer lines" on unsuspecting women across the country.

Michigan State (Paige)....Ohio State (Amy).....Minnesota (Palmer)

When they said their Dad played for Woody I was hooked

I even went running with Paige on the beach early the next morning.....and I met her mother on the beach....how about that?....and it all started by asking to change the TV channel. Oh by the way, Paige is married with children and lives in Chicago.....funny how I always seem to get along great with married women.

No, that is not actually us running....but that's how good we looked

One thing that I had to do for old times sake was pay a visit to the local Hooters establishment. My buddies and I used to make regular stops here during our golf trips and I was sure that they would want me to stop in and check the place out again. I know some people have a problem with the theme of this place and I would probably have to agree that it may be in poor taste.....but what the heck I went there anyway.